Bloody forms. Help?

Our second parent adoption process has been rumbling on in the background ever since BB made his appearance, but with the completion of our home interviews and background checks, things are moving towards a conclusion.

Annoyingly, it’s now us, not Social Services, that are holding things up.  We have to fill in a form to apply for a court date, but the form, needless to say, is not designed for us queer folk and in trying to fit our particular square peg into this particular round hole I have tied myself up in knots and can’t fathom whether we’re both applicants for this case, or whether it’s just jay.

What I need is to find someone who has done this before. So, Dear Reader, if you are out there, British and have been through a second/step-parent adoption, PLEASE get in touch so I can pick your brains before mine explodes!

vee (family filler of forms) xxx


7 responses to this post.

  1. Oh, god. We were planning on getting in touch with YOU to find out how everything works. Is it very complex??

    Also: how fucking stupid to have to adopt your own child. Ugh.


  2. Posted by scarredbellybutton on April 30, 2010 at 3:52 pm

    Cool that you get to do that (though sucky that you have to), I didn’t realise that was possible in the UK. I think we are a long way off from such things here.


  3. scarredbb – what’s even cooler is that for babies conceived after April 2009, both mums can go straight on the birth certificate. We fall the wrong side of that, hence the form filling.

    existere, it’s not been that complex so far, and I’m determined to do it without forking out for a solicitor as it should be simple enough. It’s just this form that has me a bit stumped. I think it’s because I’mstruggling to think of jay and BB’s relationship in purely legal terms. When it asks about “father or other parent” I fill in stuff relating to her, then realise that, for the purposes of this form, that doesn’t apply to her. Odd and infuriating. Made more confusing by the fact that the social services assessment is of both of us, yet the court form appears to be just for jay (I tried filling it in jointly and nearly ended up severing my own legal rights!!)


  4. Posted by K on May 1, 2010 at 1:08 am

    Wish I could help, but something tells me we’re not dealing with the same piece of paper. 🙂 We’re right there with you, though. Our final “home study” interview is Monday and our court date is May 19th. I can’t wait to get the rest of the world OUT of our family.

    Best of luck to you three as you wrap up your process!


  5. Posted by scarredbellybutton on May 1, 2010 at 3:30 am

    A couple of states here have the automatic parentage, I think they even made it retrospective! Cannot wait for our state to catch up (one day, right?), it makes me so sad that there’s a name missing from each birth certificate.


  6. Posted by svillage on May 2, 2010 at 3:33 am

    Well, I don’t have any advice but I have many good wishes. I hope the process moves swiftly and painlessly!


  7. I soooo wish we could help with your process over there. We’re JUST NOT getting ready to finish ours here! Our final court date is this next Friday. Hang in there ladies, you’ve gotten past the toughest part. I have to say though, here or on your side of the fence, they dont make this thing easy. Lots of love to you all xxoooo


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