I hear screaming.

This means we have Fucked Up.

And our solution to put things right did not work.

So now we need your solutions, please.

I have been expressing, on and off, since about 3 weeks in. At around 5 or 6 weeks, Jay gave BB his first bottle of expressed milk. So far, so good. We continued this for a few weeks, just the odd bottle here and there, maybe two or three a week. Then things got a bit sensitive around the feeding issue and for one reason and another we didn’t offer him a bottle again for a few weeks. Can you sense what is coming here?

This week, we have tried and failed to persuade our stubborn boy to take a bottle no less than three times. And it’s only Wednesday. All we’ve so far managed to achieve is to cause the poor wee mite to go purple and scream bloody murder, to the point where he’s too hysterical to even take the breast. Real tears and everything. His and ours.

Perhaps it’s the teat shape, we thought, so today Jay went out and bought some “natural shaped” teats and new bottles to go with them. Not that they look anything like my breasts at all, but hey. Same result. Perhaps even a slightly deeper shade of purple outrage.

I have generally tried to stay out of sight when Jay has offered a bottle, we’ve tried to pick times when he’s not too hungry and he seems to be in good spirits, we’ve cut down any distractions in the room, the milk is fresh and warmed. What else can we do?

Jay says she’s quite nervous of using the bottle, unsure of how far or not to push the teat in, for fear of choking him. Neither of us have much experience bottlefeeding babies, at least not in recent years. She has also been sitting in the “breastfeeding chair”, which maybe leads him to expect a BREASTfeed?

I’m always devastated to waste the milk – having warmed it, I’m assuming it’s not safe to keep and re-use. Really, the only winner in this is the dog, who keeps getting what’s been rejected on his dog biscuits. It it truly weird to give your dog breastmilk? I just can’t bear to chug it down the plughole.


vee xxx


9 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by sarah soda on June 10, 2009 at 7:17 pm

    This exact thing happened to me. So frustrating! And I was so mad at myself for forgetting to use a bottle sometimes. What worked (eventually) was using an eye dropper to drop milk in her mouth. This calmed her down enough that she could take the bottle when I was at work. Also you can try putting a bunch of expressed milk on the tip of the bottle so he knows right away what its for. The other weird solution we found was to let the hair dryer run while giving the bottle. It was a noise she associated with being calm (BB might have another sound he likes better) so that helped.The whole issue/screaming was resolved in a few days. Now she seems delighted with either bottle or nursing. Good luck!


  2. I don’t have a clue or any assvice, but I just wanted to comment that I think it’s great your sharing the “Mammal Juice Drink” as the Japanese call it, with your dog. That rocks.


  3. Just curious what kind of “flow” nipple you’re using. It should match the flow from your breast, and usually it’s a slower flow *usually*. If the milk is coming out too fast or too slow, he may be frustrated.

    When babies suck the breast, they usually get the nipple in quite far, along with part of the breast, so try to get the bottle nipple in far enough so that his only choice is to suck.


  4. We have always so far opted for the slowest flowing teat (something someone said in a comment way back about it being good to be slow, like the flow of breastmilk. I don’t think I have a particularly fast let-down and he’s never seemed to choke or gag when breastfeeding). Perhaps worth trying the faster one though?


  5. Not that I have a clue about any of this yet (remember, we’re still in just in training), but once we put the wrong nipple on a bottle while we were babysitting and the baby screamed bloody murder. Once we realized what we had done and switched the the faster one everything was better. So I recommend trying at least one size faster (do they come in various sizes?? oh god am I in trouble in 8 months….)


  6. Cakie had a moment of bottle rejection. What worked was running the nipple under hot water for a while before the feed, so the nipple was warm like a breast. Keep trying. And maybe not in the breastfeeding chair.


  7. Posted by Att on June 11, 2009 at 6:17 am

    God, I wish he was colic-y or something because then? I could help! Colic? I am teh expert. However, changing TO bottle is something I’m not good with, because both my nieces and my son were exclusively bottle fed. I, however, spent three weeks attached to my mom’s boob and then seamlessly transitioned to the bottle, so my mom can’t even help!

    I’m sorry about the wee purple menace. Hopefully the other fine ladies up thar (and possibly down thar) will be able to help far more than this useless prattle.

    Much love (in a completely platonic way)


  8. am now in a panic as W has only been offered a bottle once…yikes.


  9. First off, funny renaming of BB by Att: The wee purple manace, lol! Second, we really feel for you. We went through this in month two. Ad wasnt having it and would basically scream until said breastfeeding commenced. We tried everything and nothing worked until we bought Born Free bottles. We still to this day dont know what it is, because the nipples arent much different then any other bottle. The only big diff in these bottles is that they are leak proof. ???? Go figure. Whatever the reason, she liked them. And when you’re dealing with a purple menace, anything’s worth a shot huh? Love and patience to all xxxooo


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