It never bloody leaves.

Today I had a Bad TTC Moment.

I was in town doing errands while vee had acupuncture, when I got a text message from a friend – the same friend who told us to “enjoy the trying” ages ago – to say she and her husband would love to come to our CP celebration party in December. Only, she said, could we leave it open, because she might be pregnant by then and be suffering (again) from severe sickness?

OK so she thought it was necessary to tell me that, although I didn’t, especially as only a month ago, I reinforced how hard we’d had it over the years. Seems nothing sunk in?  She never was one of the more sensitive souls, I guess.

It made me think, though, how many times we avoided going to events like that because of TTC, and how we never found it necessary to tell people “Oh, I’m sorry we can’t come because on that date, we will find out whether we’ve failed to get up the duff for the 11th time, or if vee’s pregnant, so we’ll either be hearthbroken again or in complete shock.” Nah, we just said “Sorry, can’t make it.” Such a strange parallel.

And amidst all of that, I was walking around town trying to get rid of vee’s old sharps box and some unused needles. The chemist wrinkled up her nose and told me loudly in front of the whole shop to go to the surgery, so I traipsed to the surgery, where the receptionist looked shocked (WTF?!) and told me loudly in front of the whole waiting room that I’d have to ring Environmental Health because I was a TTC leper and she couldn’t possibly deal. Well, fuck you too.

Needless to say, I went outside, found a boulder to sit on and cried for a while. Oversensitive and periody, maybe, but, God. Some people!

On a brighter note, we are 20 weeks today. 20 weeks, people!? Unfortunately, we have to wait for our scan until the day before we hit our 22 week mark. Welcome to the NHS.

And have a great weekend.

xx jay

PS: The wedding photos are up, in case you hadn’t noticed. Usual password.


23 responses to this post.

  1. For the love of all things holy, how are you guys TWENTY WEEKS ALREADY?! 🙂 Do you find that it’s flying by? Or are you both completely in the moment every day?


  2. aaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggh! sometimes i HATE people…

    wow, 20 weeks! so exciting… and i LOVED the wedding pix.


  3. Wow…20 weeks…halfway there!

    The insensitivity of people astounds me sometimes. I think it must come from a place of insecurity and a need to “prove” oneself, especially in the case of being pregnant (again)– ha ha! look how easy it is for me! UGH.


  4. I will comment on the “brighter note”….holy crap….20 weeks!?!?! I can’t believe it!!! Happy 1/2 way mark ladies!!!!! Oh, I just looked at the wedding photos too – they are lovely!!!! You two are just too cute, and the ceremony and photographs looked beautiful!!!! Congratulations ladies!!! xoxo


  5. Ugh, all my pharmacies happily take sharps boxes, what a pain!!

    20 weeks, CONGRATS.

    Sending you a big ol hug!!!


  6. last year thanksgiving was horrible… we got a BFN that morning and went anyway. No one knew we were trying so it was something we kept tucked under our coats. Well, it was so horrible we wrote on the 2008 calendar, “Go to thanksgiving late, eat and leave early.” I only noticed it this morning when i flipped to november. I try to keep in mind those ugly TTC days, those who work at it long enough to learn the ttc acronym, i think we have a greater respect for the universe and those secret keepers that may or may not be out there…

    o, holy moly 1/2 way! Woo hoo!


  7. Wow, I can’t believe you are already 20 wks along. That is amazing. It has gone by really fast reading about it.
    No one would take the sharps? That’s a little crazy, but hey I don’t live in England and ya’ll do things different over there on your side of the pond:)
    I probably would’ve just put them on the counter and told them to deal with it, but I’m bitchy like that.


  8. I think they thought that poor jay was a heroin addict trying to offload her works!! We’ve had to arrange for a home collection for the damned thing by Environmental Health!! And they won’t take the unused needles, just the sharps box, so heaven knows what we’ll do with them!!


  9. Those TTC moments can be hard and never really go away. We can’t forget the experience.

    WooHoo on 20 weeks!! 1/2 way there!!!! It starts going faster now.


  10. Photos are lovely and you both look wonderful. Cute belly.


  11. congrats on 20 weeks, wow, it seems like time has flown! i’d love to see your photos but can’t seem to find the PW in my email, would you mind sending it again?


  12. hurrah for 20 weeks!!!! That is bananas about the pharmacy treating you like that. What wanks!
    And your “enjoy the trying” friend can kiss it. I swear people can just be assholes.
    Thank goodness neither of you are.


  13. Might be pregnant – I can’t believe that… people are so insensitive. It is unbelievable.

    20 weeks on the otherhand is so wonderful. I can’t believe you guys are half way there. xo


  14. Posted by wishinghopingpraying on October 24, 2008 at 9:52 pm

    20 weeks already!! How exciting.
    Sorry about the sharps box, how frustrating.


  15. *glaring menacingly at the crappy people*

    on a better note: YAY FOR 20 WEEKS!!!


  16. Congrats on 20 weeks! YAYYYY 🙂 Tell those people you got a little somethin’ to help their knee caps out. Then show em’ your bat 🙂 Hang in there kids…..


  17. Posted by scarredbellybutton on October 25, 2008 at 2:21 pm

    Nope it never goes away.

    Congrats on half way!!! are you going to find out the sex?


  18. Oh oh what is the usual password?? Email me on – Yay for 20 weeks, we are soooo happy for you guys!


  19. Hi there, I think you used to be on FF and I am really excited that you too are 20 weeks I am too! I lost a baby last year but thanks to the lovely NHS (for once!) I am pregnant and hopfully able to go full term this time! I have just been reading around the blogs and so pleased to see that you made it!

    And on the subject of people being insensitive I totally know what you mean. Some people just dont know do they when to 1. not say somthing and 2. think before they speak!

    Good luck to you, I will be following! And hopefully updating my blog a bit more!!!

    Jen x


  20. So sorry that it never leaves.

    I am so thrilled about the 20-week mark.


  21. Your friend sounds oblivious at best. What a horrible thing to say.

    Congrats on half way – that’s amazing. You two are an inspiration!

    I probably would have thrown the sharps box into the trash after all that…but I think that might make me a bad person…


  22. Posted by docgrumbles on October 28, 2008 at 8:37 pm

    Sorry people are still unkind and insensitive at times.

    Congrats on 20 weeks!


  23. Posted by yup, another sara on October 29, 2008 at 3:04 am

    I’m sorry everyone was so shitty about your sharps– I’ll have to figure out what to do with ours eventually too. I am so excited that you are at 20 weeks– halfway there!! And the insensitive woman you mentioned? She’s lucky she’s nowhere near me– I am hopped up on Follistim and I would kick her bloody ass!


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