onwards and upwards

Nothing like a busy weekend to take your mind off things, eh?

I did take a little time to chronical our baby-making efforts so far, which will be up as a separate page as soon as I finish prettying it up. Is it just me, or is the word “journey” really starting to seem trivial and deeply inadequate to the point of being insulting? Perhaps it should be prefaced with “epic”, or abandoned in favour of “fight” or “struggle”? Ok, it’s probably just me. I think the listing out of it all was rather a depressing experience. Perhaps I should have taken heed of Mel. However, I’ve started, so I’ll finish. Complete with costings when I get a minute, so I can at least say I have reponded to the 12.5% call to arms.

In other, more up-and-at-’em news, I’ll be having an HSG tomorrow evening! A small part of me is scared I’ll discover I have no fallopian tubes or something equally drastic and that we’ve been wasting our efforts all this time. A much bigger part of me is expecting that this, just like everything else, will not offer us any explanations as to why we’re still on the starting line.

We were both deeply touched that so many of you took the time to leave some words of comfort here for us when it didn’t work for us last time. I honestly can’t imagine getting through this without you lot out there, so thanks. Thanks too for those that made suggestions about other things we could try to help, or other tests, etc. On the back of that advice, I have been for another blood draw to see if my “borderline thyroid” of result several months ago is any different. I’m also seriously thinking about acupuncture, though I don’t think we can stretch to that AND the HSG this month, sadly.

If this attempt fails, we will FINALLY be considered for drugs such as clomid, trigger shots etc. The healthcare culture in this country is so different from what I read of that in the States, even when paying privately, and that has been a huge barrier to us. Fertility clinics here are pretty much obliged to follow the NICE guidelines on fertility treatment. In a nutshell, for those, like me, who have no detected fertility issues, that’s 3x unmedicated IUIs, followed by 3x medicated IUIs before progression to IVF. Our 9 previous attempts with a known donor are disregarded and my age was not considered advanced enough to fast-track us through this treatment approach. Add to this the fact that we have to pay for everything, and you’ll see why we’re pretty much stuck with this. An unmedicated IUI costs us £1100.00. If we move up a gear from this, blood monitoring instead of OPKs would be an extra £100.00; each follicle-monitoring ultrasound scan would be £55.00; induction of ovulation another £350.00. By the time you reach IVF, you’re looking at £3250.00 If you’re playing in $$ not ££s, you can just double those figures.

Finally, for those wondering what response jay got, it was a great and surprisingly sensitive and understanding one. He’s coming; she isn’t. We’re relieved. Is that bad?



11 responses to this post.

  1. I’m glad jay’s brother is understanding. It sounds like a very compassionate response, which is precisely what you two deserve after all you’ve been through.

    Good luck with the HSG!! It’s supposed to clear those tubes right out of even the most minor of blockages and increase the chance for a success for the following 3 months. Yay!!

    Sending you all our thoughts of peace and baby dust!


  2. No, that’s not bad. Lots of luck with the HSG, I’m sure they will find everything is where it’s supposed to be.


  3. Posted by tbean on November 19, 2007 at 7:33 pm

    So glad you had a positive exchange with Jay’s bro and that your holiday will be a little less stressful now. I hope the HSG is not too painful and that it does its job and gets your body ready to welcome a baby. Finally! Damnit! You 2 have been through too much!


  4. Posted by amyjay on November 19, 2007 at 8:50 pm

    No it’s not just you. I thought the same thing the other day. Maybe I’ll replace it with saga.

    I hope your HSG goes smoothly.


  5. Good luck with the hsg.

    Even if you have no tubes, wouldn’t you want to know now before soending any more money on treatments requiring that you have them?

    Hoping you do indeed have fallopian tubes, though.


  6. I vote for epic! Kind of like Gilgamesh, or Beowulf – we could make a movie of all this shit! With computer generated figures instead of the real us! It would, of course, have a happy ending, where we all get our babies and waltz off into our respective homes in the mythical town of IVP-ville.
    Clearly, all this bleeding has gone to my head.
    xo, y’all.


  7. Good luck for the HSG, I hope your fears are not realised (ahh it takes me back).


  8. I always forget that it’s so different in the UK from the US– that you can’t decide when it’s time to escalate. It’s utter bullshit that all the times you’ve tried at home on your own don’t count.

    I hope the HSG is reasonably painless. Mine wasn’t too awful– drugs before would be good, whatever they will let you take. For me it was more about anxiety than actual discomfort. I hope it blows out any possible obstructions in your tubes and that you get pregnant on the very next try.


  9. Posted by reproducinggenius on November 20, 2007 at 3:34 pm

    It’s not bad at all, and I’m so glad that’s what is happening.

    I hope the HSG works its magic and is as painless as it can be.


  10. Posted by notesfrom2moms on November 20, 2007 at 4:26 pm

    You two have occupied my thoughts for the past few days… keep your spirits up, love each other, and keep going.


  11. I vote for “debacle”:
    1. A sudden, disastrous collapse, downfall, or defeat; a rout.
    2. A total, often ludicrous failure.
    3. The breaking up of ice in a river.
    4. A violent flood.
    I think that apart from 3 they all pretty much fit at some point or another!
    Please let me know the link you told me about on FF… I’ve got my fingers crossed for you!


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